Is It Right To Stare At A Woman's Rear?

Women are such beautiful creatures. When I said they're beautiful I mean physical beauty. It is said that the creator spent a lot of time in designing the shape of a woman that he had to create man first, give him life then continue with designing of a woman. Their beautiful faces, their soft skin and their sweet voices but most of all their body morphology. But let me not talk that much about that and go back to what I actually wanted to write.




Is it right to stare at a woman's rear?  ... YES ... NO... YES..

I think the right answer would be "SOMETIMES". Majority of you might disagree, but please just let me say what I've got to say and you can say what you want to say by posting a comment, deal? 


When I was in a bus last week, something happened. There was only one seat available, when a woman with quite a big 'behind' entered. There was no way possible that she could fit in the seat available so she decided to stand. Now most bus conductors don't like it when passengers stand. They normally say "Basun Ghya. Nahi Tar Pudhe Chala" --That is "Sit or Move". The conductor turned and was about to tell the lady to sit on the remaining seat, but by looking at the huge package that the woman had, he stared for  while... swallowed so much saliva at once and turned back.


That's when I got the answer for the question I asked. "SOMETIMES, it's alright to stare" Staring is actually looking at something with fixed eyes. The conductor had to calculate the size of the woman's rear and calculate the size of the available seat, then his brain calculator must have brought an ERROR. So he just turned back. But how can I answer the question basing on only one scenario? OK here's another..




Now I'll ask the question one more time, Is it right to stare at a woman's rear?

And you know the answer now... SOMETIMES.

"Four Things" About Me.

Four jobs I have had:
1. Director of Dinnerware Sanitation and Distribution (i.e. Dishwasher)

2. Senior Target Deployment Specialist (i.e. Call Center Executive)

3. Advanced Concrete Placement Coordinator (i.e. Laborer at a precast concrete company. I say "Adavanced" because I spoke English and could use a tape measure)

4. Compliant Data Mining Technician (i.e. data entry slave at some data processing company)

Four movies I can watch over and over:
1. Rang De Basanti
2. 3 Idiots
3. Dumb and Dumber
4. Deshdrohi

Four places I have lived: 
1. B/302.
2. B/302, Gopchar.
3. B/302, Gopchar, Dr. Annie Besant Road.
4. B/302, Gopchar, Dr. Annie Besant Road, Worli, Mumbai-400018.

Four places I have vacationed:
1. Lonavla (age 10)
2. Mahabaleshwar (Bought a fake Rolex. I was 15)
3. Mangalore (age 23)
4. Alibaug 

Four people I hate the most:
1. Sachin Pilgaonkar
2. Sachin Pilgaonkar
3. Sachin Pilgaonkar
4. And you too. 

Four of my favorite dishes:
1. Royal Doulton
2. Bohemian Crystal
3. Waterford
4. Chinet 

Oh wait, not Dishes, "Dishes":
1. Paani Puri (I think Paani-Puri should be declared as a national food of India.) 
2. Pav Bhaji.
3. Varan Bhaat ani Batatyachi Bhaji.
4. ANYTHING made with chicken.

Four sites I visit (almost) daily:
1. Google (With Safe Search OFF)
2. Twitter
3. Olx
4. Blogger (I'm the kind of guy who refreshes his own blog page so it looks like more people have viewed it.)

Four TV shows I love:
1. Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi
2. Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki
3. Balika Vadhu
4. Naa Aana Iss Des Laado

Four Cartoon shows I love:
1. Tom And Jerry
2. Oggy And The Cockroaches(Hindi Version)
3. Duck Tales
4. Spongebob Squarepants

Four Places I'd Rather Be Right Now:
1. In bed.
2. In bed asleep.
3. In bed asleep laying next to my imaginary girlfriend.
4. In bed asleep laying next to my imaginary girlfriend without my imaginary dog and he's outstretched legs jabbing into my back.

Some Funny Facts

I got this email and was hilarious so thought of sharing it.


If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. 
 (Hardly seems worth it.) 


If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it !) 


The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.    (O..M.G.!) 


A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes. 
        (In my next life, I want to be a pig..) 


A cockroach will live nine days without it's head before it starves to death.    (Creepy.)
(I'm still not over the pig.) 


Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour
(Don't try this at home, maybe at work) 


The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home. What the...?) 


The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field. (30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?) 


The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?) 


Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity) 


Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.) 


The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. 
 (Hmmmmmm...... not the guy's???) 


Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?) 


Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing) 


A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out.) 


An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.) 


Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.) 


Polar bears are left-handed. 
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer) 


Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig??) 

Life In A Metro.

 The streetlights are our stars, forming constellations above our heads as we inhale fumes and cigarette smoke. 


Beggars lie across stained streets marked with cracks, gaps, and the remnants of old chewing gum and cigarette butts. If you focus hard enough, you might just catch the gleam of unwanted pennies that litter the floor like dust gathering along car dashboards. The homeless seem at peace though, and how could they not be. Staring up with their backs to the ground, there's nothing to do but confuse the city lights for the stars that shine behind them. 




The universe can only fade into the background.

Moments When Facebook Told Me That People Don’t Change.

1) The Sometimes Friend

I went to school with a dude named Baban(Imaginary Name). Baban was odd in that he’d be your friend one week, and the next he wouldn’t talk to you. By middle school, he’d moved away. Up until then, I thought Baban’s behavior was specific to me until a friend said, “Remember Baban? That dude was a total fairweather friend.” Others agreed. Baban was weird like that with everyone, apparently.

So when he sent me a friend request on Facebook a couple years ago - nearly a half decade later - I accepted. Whatever, dude. Water under the bridge, right? Good to be Internet friends with you. Can’t wait to go through your vacation photos for no reason.

According to Facebook, his girlfriend went to the same college as me and she was a good friend of mine, so it’s possible he found me because she and I were in the same network. Apparently, he was going to another college nearby. Weeks had passed since he added me, so one day I figured I’d send him a message and ask if he was ever in town. If he’s around, then why not get a coffee or something, right?

But then I couldn’t get to his profile to send him a message. Because he had unfriended me.

For no reason, I’d guess. We hadn’t even corresponded with each other yet. Disappointing, but not surprising, I guess. Should’ve seen it coming.

2) Social Makeup Girl

I used to work with a girl named Shoorpanakha(Once Again An Imaginary Name. Actually, I'm quite good in this naming thing). Shoorpanakha was pretty, and hung with the popular crowd. She always wore makeup to the point where you noticed, “hey, she’s wearing makeup,” but she was nice. She was quiet, but I got the idea she might be party girl outside the office. (Isn’t that what you assume the popular crowd does outside the office? Go to drunken parties all the time?) I don’t think she was necessarily a shallow person, but my interactions with her were always short and polite, lacking any real substance, and I was cool with that.

Flash forward 4 years later, and she’s sending me a Facebook friend request. And guess what? We have over 55 friends in common. Over fifty-five! Wow! You’d think we were good friends, given that number! Whoa!

I click through to her profile pictures and in a few of them, she’s wearing so much makeup she kinda looks like The Joker. (But, like, a sexy, partying Joker? Is that a thing?) Either way, nobody in the last 4 years had sat her down and told her that the point of makeup isn’t for people to think “Wow, she’s wearing a lot of makeup!” But whatever. My point is, the weird  makeup thing was not an office phase. It was a lifestyle, apparently.

And, while I don’t think that a Facebook friendship is a sacred bond built on trust and mutual admiration, I still think it’s a kind of a dick move to send out friend requests to everyone you vaguely recognize. So, imagine how pleasantly surprised I was when Shoorpanakha had included a personal message with her Facebook friend request!

I opened the friend request email, and it said this:

Shoorpanakha wants to be friends with you on Facebook.

[Thumbnail image of her smiling, super-tanned face]

Shoorpanakha says, “Include a personal message…”.

How sweet. She somehow sent me the default message text that’s supposed to disappear as soon as you click inside the personal message form field.

I wondered, did she send that same message to the other 55 people that we share as friends, or was I special? Was she maintaining our tradition of being vaguely aware of each other while she stayed pretty and I stayed judgmental on the Internet, or did it just work out that way? Sometimes it’s reassuring to know that things don’t change.

Life.

If living was easy I wouldn’t have been dead inside,
It was unbearable so I pretend to be alive,
I was so truthful once upon a time,
Then I became a soul full of lies.
I’m in awe at how quickly my mind approved contamination,
Sensuously it rushed through my blood,
Like adrenaline catapulted,
Euphoric,
The bad kind,
The sick kind.
Yet my fascination with these desires were never ending,
Its like an invisible snare; its close was pending,
Waiting, calculating, my steps,
Till I put the one foot wrong and I was indebted to the devils, surrounding me.

Bus conversation with the friendly girl in the seat next to me

• Me: Tons of people meeting online and getting married these days.
• Girl: I know. I could never do that. I don't even have a Facebook account.
• Me: That's cool, though. Not having a Facebook account is the new not having a television.
• Girl: I don't have a television.
• Me: Well, there you go.

IN REVIEW: COLDPLAY “MYLO XYLOTO”

Okay, so the title of Coldplay’s fifth studio album has been a bit of a tongue twister, but I assure you that everything you find behind that pretty album cover is a lot less complicated (and does not make you feel like you need to go back to kindergarten due to lack of pronunciation skills). In fact, it’s big, colourful and quite the spectacle….and, in many ways. 


As I'm a huge Coldplay fan, I felt nervous going into the first listen of this album, because this album is too electronic, but then I came back for a second, a third, a fourth listen – and with every listen, there is that much more to fall in love with than you previously thought. The heart and soul of what makes Coldplay the brilliant foursome they are is still there, but now it’s wrapped in electro-synth pop music, occasionally splashed with some R&B (See: Upcoming single, Princess of China, feat Rihanna).


Mylo Xyloto is a concept album telling the story of a boy and a girl who fall in love under tumultuous circumstances. Coldplay tosses in a steady stream of drum kicks and synth riffs to keep the momentum going.. Songs like Paradise, Every Teardrop is a Waterfall and Hurts Like Heaven are joyous and fun, and they’re made for those runs across campus or a even a road trip. 

At its core, you still get everything you would want from a Coldplay album – the melodic hooks, the semi incomprehensible lyrics, and a brilliant melding of each member’s talents. They remind you that things can still be pretty swell, even if the world isn’t as agreeable.

Childhood Memories

If you could rewind your time, would you change your life?

I always lived my life by this quote "Live life with no regrets". So yes, if I could rewind my time right now, I don't think I'd want to change anything about it. Even if there were a lot of mistakes done along the way, I've learnt from them and it has in fact, made me stronger. A better person inside if you might say. 



I miss being a kid. I miss smiling and laughing for no reason. I miss running around endlessly in circles. I miss the slides, the seasaws. I miss playing in the mud on a rainy afternoon, or playing in the sand by the beach. I miss waking up early in the morning on a Sunday just to watch my favourite TV show. I miss riding my bicycle with the other kids in the neighbourhood. I miss all the little adventures I had with my brother and my next door neighbour. I miss everything.

Sharp Temptation

If you don't own an iPhone, please click here
Or, you could just stay here. The talk of the town has finally hit the Indian stores. Yes, the iPhone 4S. I'm beginning to feel like if you don't have an iPhone, you're life isn't complete.

While everybody's getting iPads and iPhones, all I got was a Nokia X3. I have to admit, I'm not at the top of my game anymore. But on the other hand when X3 did go down I so badly craved the iPhone. I always think I'd look so stylish walking down the road with my iPhone in one hand, Louis Vuitton bag resting on my shoulder with my coffee cup in the other hand, looking like a celebrity (Yeah, I know I live in dream world). So, few months back I bought myself an iPhone. It was one of the most amazing days of my life. By far, it was the most incredible piece of technology that I ever had. I went from an old Nokia X3 to an iPhone. What a giant leap!


Steve Jobs made for certain that Apple developed technology that was available to the common person. I will always be grateful to him, and the Apple engineers and employees who worked on the iPhone. From the day I opened the box and held my iPhone so gently in my hand, I was in love. Sometimes I would tear up as I swiped to unlock the screen, and watch it come to life. I would stare at the apps with their bright colors, just waiting to be touched. I was so happy. 


But unfortunately some low life stole my 'Love' from me. I wish him a life filled with dropped calls, bad service, overage charges, and cracked screens! 




Since then every month I'm putting some money into a pot and saving it for the new iPhone. I deserve it. And this time I'm definitely going put a Micromax sticker over the Apple logo on my iPhone, so that I'll never have to worry about it getting stolen again.

Resurrection

Finally after much contemplation and procrastination, I am back on Blogger. This blog is probably the hundredth blog I opened. All this while was so lazy to create a blog but today I just have the MOOD to do one. I never thought that writing my first post after a long time would be this scary, knowing that potentially people will be reading it (If I'm Lucky). Well if you are reading this, I'd like to say a 'Hello and Thank You'. Like so many others I've been reading such amazing blogs almost daily and thought that I might like to give it a go. Considering that this is a new blog, I will start it off by writing a little bit about myself.  

I don't talk a lot, too often. My crass words usually find approval in the absence of wit or originality that surrounds me. It's an abyss, not one which I choose to fill, but rather one which extracts my mind and places it in plain view for the enjoyment of others.

I enjoy it though, and that's quite obvious. However, sometimes I feel limited. Status updates and 140 characters are far too little for the potential outpouring of words I have to offer. It walls me up. I need a space. Well, needed. I have one now.  

I have no idea how long this will last. My blog might just become another soulless splinter on the edge of faux reality. It might not even last a month. Or it might last long enough for me to actually start something productive.  

For now, I'm clueless. I don't think that will change anytime soon. I'm not really sure how to end this post so I'll let you imagine what I would say.